Why Violence & Revenge Fantasies Feel Good - James Kimmel Jr. - #989
September 4, 2025
1 hr 38 min
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987 of 1,112
Episode 989 · September 4, 2025
Why Violence & Revenge Fantasies Feel Good - James Kimmel Jr. - #989
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Why Violence & Revenge Fantasies Feel Good - James Kimmel Jr. - #989
Summary
James Kimmel Jr. is a professor at Yale, a psychiatrist, and an author.
Why are we drawn to revenge? From playground grudges to epic betrayals, the urge to strike back is universal. But is it a survival mechanism, or an ancient drive that no longer fits the modern age?
Expect to learn why the feeling of revenge exists and how it is adaptive, what the biggest triggers of the desire for revenge is, why revenge and revenge fantasies make us feel good, the difference between revenge seeking and self defence or boundary setting, if some people happen to be more vengeful than others, if you should be lauding to forgive rathe than seek revenge, the steps to move through forgiveness, and much more…
Timestamps:
(0:00) Choosing to Not Choose Revenge
(7:57) Why Do We Feel Desire for Revenge?
(11:39) What are the Biggest Drivers of Revenge?
(15:06) How Do We Recover from Revenge Seeking?
(21:40) Is There a Connection Between Addictive Behaviour and Revenge?
(24:47) The Difference Between Revenge-Seeking and Self-Defence
(33:17) The Muddling of Justice and Revenge
(43:46) Revenge Isn’t Evil, It’s Retribution
(50:35) What Outcomes Drive Revenge?
(56:48) The Legal System is a Professional Revenge Business
(58:36) The Cycle of Revenge on Social Media
(01:06:50) What is Social Justice?
(01:09:10) Are Certain Groups More Susceptible to Revenge?
(01:14:55) Warning Signs for Revenge Desire
(01:19:12) Strategies to Stop Revenge Desire
(01:21:13) What Does Modern Revenge and Forgiveness Culture Look Like?
(01:34:43) Find Out More About James
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