The Day the GOP Died

As Donald Trump secures the Republican nomination for president, the GOP convention feels more like a wake than a wedding. And what's a wake without a good drinking song?

THE DAY THE GOP DIED

A long, long time ago

I can still remember how their principles made me smile

And I knew if they had a chance

The GOP could advance

A conservative agenda for the rank n’file

But Super Tuesday made me shiver

With every election result delivered

Bad news on the internet

Trump amassing all the delegates

I can't remember if I cried

When news came of the Indiana landslide

Something touched me deep inside

The day the GOP died

CHORUS

So bye, bye Republican part-y

No Cruz, Paul, or Kasich and now Trump is the guy

And them red state boys gave a scream and a sigh

Sayin’ this’ll be the day the GOP dies

This’ll be the day the GOP dies

Did you read the Constitution

Or toss it away for Trump’s Bible collection

It’s big, strong, and ten feet tall

Now those who wish to immigrate

Will be thwarted by huge, tall gate

or perhaps the biggest, most beautiful wall

Well I knew the party was going down

When even Paul Ryan wore a frown

And people even started to like Cruz

Now we’ve got those GOP blues

I was a lonely voter without a voice

In a party controlled by the good old boys

But now it seems we have no choice

The day the GOP died

CHORUS REPEAT