Near Mortified Narcissist Hoovers YOU to Self-soothe, Halt Mortification

Narcissistic mortification is an extreme form of decompensation when all the narcissist’s defenses crumble as a result of a deeply traumatizing, challenging, and humiliating event.

Mortification: event, dissociation, processing the event cognitively and emotionally (unconscious), choice of external or internal response

Trauma: event, automatic (traumatic) response, processing the event cognitively and emotionally (unconscious), dissociation

The narcissist copes with mortification in one of two ways:

1. He renders it external, casting himself as the hapless victim of malicious, envious, mentally ill people. This preserves his self-image as good and morally upright, but leads to depression.

2. He renders it internal and accepts his contribution to the mortifying event and his ensuing responsibility. Such reframing restores his sense of mastery and control over the situation and others (neurotic autoplastic solution).

Both choices result in hypervigilance, paranoid and referential ideation, and persecutory delusions.

Collapse and mortification regulate mood and switching between self-states ("diagnoses").

Challenge to his grandiosity: hoover you and then, when he succeeds, IMMEDIATELY dump you vindictively.

1. Reaffirm his grandiosity ("I am irresistible")

2. Punish you for your "transgressions"

3. Teach you to "behave yourself" in the future (like housebreaking a pet).

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