How To Guarantee You Won’t Make It

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Unfortunately AlternateHistoryHub had to cancel this week, so we had to shift gears a bit. No need to worry, he’s alright and he’ll be back for another episode soon, but we thought we’d use the time this week to give you some more invaluable advice. So, if you’re in the market to fail, you’re in luck because we’ve come up with six easy steps to guarantee you won’t make it.

Step number one is pretty simple: if you want to be unsuccessful, be resentful. We start by talking about some of the exceptions to the rule who’ve found success just by being resentful, but it comes at a cost. One way or another, that resentment doesn’t last, and it’s more than likely to turn sour for you pretty quickly.

Our second step is to be a DISASTER. If you don’t get the simple stuff in your life together, the rest isn’t far behind. Getting on top of the basics is one of the most valuable things you can do, not only for your health and well being, but to keep yourself prepared for any surprises that might get thrown your way.

If you really don’t want to make it anywhere, one of the best things you can do is just wait around and hope to get lucky. As it turns out, though, luck isn’t entirely serendipitous. The odds of something just falling into your lap on a whim are slim to none, and even if it does happen, it won’t matter much if you aren’t ready for it.

It’s pretty easy to completely isolate yourself these days, and there’s plenty of cold hard facts out there that say more people are doing exactly that. After all, everything you could ever want to do that suits your interests is right at your fingertips, so why wouldn’t you?

Step five is most applicable to our creatives in the crowd. If you don’t want to make it, obsess over originality. Because if you do, odds are you won’t wind up making anything at all. It’s easy to get bogged down in trying to make something entirely new, so your best bet at making something is to just throw that out the window in the first place.

Our final rule for failure is a short one – say no. If the nervous part of you gives in, and you say no to every opportunity that comes your way, pretty soon you’re going to run out of opportunities. You don’t know what saying yes to something might lead to, so you might as well roll the dice and take that chance, because turning it down is guaranteed to bring nothing at all.

Thanks to everyone who tuned in live this week, and to all our patrons who make every single episode happen. We’ll be back next week for an exciting episode with Reed Duchscher!