Hawk
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Kash Patel's Children's Books Are About Election Conspiracies and Literal Poop
Posted
December 26, 2025
Views
2,625
Likes
267
Comments
64
Engagement
12.61%
December 26, 2025
2,625
267
64
12.61%
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6:20Now PlayingKash Patel's Children's Books Are About Election Conspiracies and Literal Poop
Kash Patel, the current FBI director, has written two children's books that feature some of the most bizarre content imaginable. The second book centers entirely around the 2000 mules conspiracy theory from Dinesh D'Souza's election documentary, except instead of people, the story features actual mules leaving poop all over city streets on election night. The children's book contains illustrations of poop on every single page, with characters conducting forensic examinations of mule poop samples to investigate election fraud. The story features Dinesh D'Souza as a curious candlestick maker named Desh, along with his wife Debbie, who team up with characters based on Catherine Engelbrecht and Greg Phillips from True the Vote.
These alchemists study the poop in the streets and determine that 2000 mules visited multiple ballot boxes set up by Mark Zuckerberg. One mule poop sample even contains glowing pink berries and came from a mule that visited 27 different ballot boxes. Beyond the bizarre subject matter, the writing quality is remarkably poor, with awkward phrasing like "I've discovered that it cannot be discovered" and forced medieval dialogue. The first Kash Patel children's book also features questionable writing with a wizard character and confusing plot points.
Hawk performs a dramatic reading of both children's books in front of his wood burning stove on Christmas Eve, highlighting the absurdity of an FBI director authoring election conspiracy children's books filled with mule poop on every page.
#KashPatel #DineshDSouza #2000Mules #TrueTheVote #CatherineEngelbrecht #GregPhillips #MarkZuckerberg #FBI #ElectionConspiracy #ChildrensBooks #Politics #Election2020 #Comedy #PoliticalSatire #News #CurrentEvents #Government #Democracy #Satire #Humor #BreakingNews #Hawk #HawkPodcasts #MDG650Hawk #dramaticreading
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