"Everyone look at the Sad Child!" - How the media spin illegal immigration

Get tickets for my standup

Catch my livestreams on Patreon:

The mainstream media response to the migrant invasion of Ceuta followed a predictable pattern. They said the real issue was the far right, the migration is caused by climate change, the migrants have all gone home, social media is full of fake news, oh and look at this Sad Child.

Of course, it turned out that the footage of the Sad Child was orchestrated by mainstream media camera crews who told him how to pose. And far from social media sharing fake news - if it hadn't been for social media, we wouldn't have known about this fake news on mainstream media.

The Sad Child narrative is now being used as a reason to ship thousands of migrant children to mainland Europe. But these "children" are predominantly men pretending to be children. It would probably be a more sensible immigration policy to just bring adult men in, because then at least then they aren't placed in schools.

Lefty celebrity (is there any other kind?) Javier Bardem couldn't help but let his guard slip and reveal that immigration isn't the vital enrichment that we've been told it is. Apparently, this immigration is being used by Israel to punish Spain. These men must be Schrodinger's Migrants - simultaneously enriching and punishing.

Oh, and apparently the far right are delighted about the chaos in Ceuta, including the 72 deaths of migrants swimming in. This makes no sense. The far right have been talking about how we need stronger border controls to stop this kind of thing happening. It happened because of the left, who are desperate to import leftwing voters.

Get a hair transplant from the place that did mine!

I'm doing Work in Progress standup comedy shows and full tour shows. Details

Check out my Patreon for livestreams and exclusive content