"The flags!" Lefty snob moves to Essex - and regrets it. But what about London's indigenous peoples?

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A clip went viral this week of left-wing journalist Serena Kutchinsky telling the tear-jerking story of how she moved her family out of London to Essex by accident. She then discovered it wasn't a multicultural paradise full of mosques, schizophrenic yardies and vape shops, so moved them back.

Her main complaints? People flew the St George's Cross and Union Jack. How dare people put up British flags? What do they think this place is, Britain or something? No, it's communist zone number 5612 of the global Socialist Utopian Council!

For a long time, East London flew Palestinian flags, and I bet she didn't complain once.

I wonder if it's the cohesiveness, the sense of community, that she didn't like? Living in central London is a very atomized experience. You don't have the issue of people talking about you in the pub because nobody knows who you are. And the pub's been converted into a mosque.

Also Buckhurst Hill, the place in Essex that she moved to, isn't a remote rural coastal community. It's in the M25! And it's pretty multi-ethnic - obviously not as brown as Hackney, where white people have been pushed off their land by wave after wave of migration, but it's around 20% ethnic minority.

And we need to talk about the Cockney land clearances.

Cockneys are an indigenous tribe to Britain. They have their own identity and culture - a culture that’s been around for about 800 years. They were the character of London - Britain’s biggest soap opera, Eastenders, is based on Cockney culture. Their land has been colonised, and they've been pushed off it.

If you travel through East London now, you'll find Bangladeshi, Indian, Pakistani, African, Somali cultures, but very few Cockneys. They've been forced out through organised state-run ethnic cleansing, placing alien cultures in their areas until the Cockneys had to move out to Essex.

Now, if the Cockneys were an Amazonian tribe, people like Serena Kutchinsky would be falling over themselves to protect Cockney culture and preserve their land as a reservation. UNESCO would have designated the Dagenham River Basin a World Heritage Site, where Millwall fans, pearly queens and pie and mash shops would receive government subsidies to live as their authentic selves. Cockneys would perhaps even get to run casinos (or at least dog tracks).

She's moving back to the ancestral tribal lands of the Cockney. If these were the lands of any other Aboriginal tribe, she wouldn't move there out of respect, and when she visited those lands, she'd be careful to give a land acknowledgement.

Do you think anybody's giving land acknowledgements to the Cockneys?

"We acknowledge and honour the First Nations Cockneys as the Traditional Custodians on whose stolen ancestral lands our multicultural utopia is built, and whose taxes are harvested to pay the benefits of the people we imported to replace them because Cockneys are not leftwing enough.

We reflect on the forced exile and the sanctioned dispossession of the Cockney Peoples, whose pubs and pie and mash shops were erased to make way for mosques and vape shops. We affirm the Cockneys sovereignty of East London, and commit ourselves to upholding their ancient language of Cockney rhyming slang - I’m not telling porky pies, you’ve got to adam and eve me. Mill-wall.

However, I'd just like to reiterate that you're not getting your land back. My £2 million terraced house is there, and the slave class that clean it and raise my children around the corner in social housing, subsidised by your taxes."

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